Well ...
by LadyDelores
Summary: My first fic under LadyDelores. I just know you're going to love it. Ash followers consider yourselves warned.
1. Default Chapter Title

LadyDelores and Miss.S   
Sunday, October 22, 2000 

Disclaimer: I have no rights to DBZ, but I do own this story. DBZ belongs to Akira Toryiama, and the characters have been used without permission. No infringement is intended, and no monetary gain has been made from this story. My original character Ash, .: cough, cough:. is in no way related to Ash the Wanderer. .:cough, cough:.

"Well ... " 

ChiChi continued stirring the pot as she watched her husband try to solve the puzzle. He was holding a piece close to his face, studying it intently. She smiled and looked from the box lid to the completed pieces. She shook her head with amusement.

===

Goku lifted another puzzle piece to his nose and inhaled deeply. The packaging fumes made his nose burn, but he felt too good to care. he set the piece on the table, and reached for another.

"Can you not work a child's game?" Vegeta's smug voice penetrated Goku's concentration.

Goku's fume muddled mind tried to comprehend what he meant. "Huh?"

"Those pieces don't go there. Look at the pictures!" Bulma shouted impatiently.

Goku looked from the box, to his puzzle, to the box lid, and finally settled on the completed pieces. "Well ... " he gave an intoxicated laugh,. "Take away my smarts and call me Ash the Wanderer!"

"Hey! Don't dis Ash!" Chiaotzu called from his box on the floor. "He's a good guy. He can't help it if imbeciles trash his work!"

A bright light appeared. A figure emerged and firmly patted Chiaotzu on the head. He whispered softly, "Meet me later,"

Chiaotzu nodded, "The wood shack?"

"We'll need more room, I'm thinking the tool shed."

The conversation ended and the figure turned to all present.

"Oh!" Bulma cried. "You have another fic for us to star in," She turned to her husband. "C'mon Vegeta, let's go to our room."

"Actually, this stars Bra and Tien," Ash interrupted the couple's ascent up the stairs.

The little girl latched on to her mother's arm. "I don't wanna!"

"You don't have a choice, Bra." Ash said stiffly.

Bra started crying and sobbing "No..."

"Ash, she's just a little girl," ChiChi interrupted. 

"Fine," Ash's voice was more cocky than usual. "Bulma, Vegeta, in your room. I'll be there to observe in a minute." The couple went up the stairs and Ash turned back to the assembled group. "Gohan, Goten, I'm thinking demon possession for you two. Let's go kill some people, and I'll meet you outside."

===

Miss.S stopped driving and pulled the car to the side of the road.

"What's wrong?" LadyDelores asked, but she too was shuddering. "Oh, please no..."

"Ash is writing again," Miss.S said with deceptive calmness.

"Should we try to pay him to stop writing?"

"He didn't listen last time. It won't work, he is too far gone,"

LadyDelores shook her head sadly. "We should brace ourselves."

"Yes," Miss.S agreed, "After all, this is the "God of Fanfiction" we're up against."

END PART ONE 

___________________________________________________________________

Well, people were complaining that I didn't write under LadyDelores, so I am going to write as LadyDelores. Heh, heh, heh. This is just part one of an ongoing fic in which Ash-haters fight the creation of Ash's newest story. Ash the Wanderer writes these, so why can't I? (Although I can't believe I'm writing like Ash). Oh yeah, the Ash in this fic is in no way related to Ash the Wanderer. .:snicker:. If any other Ash-bashers want a part in this, e-mail me. I'd love to write you in. (lady_delores_no_space@hotmail.com)


	2. Chapter 2

LadyDelores  
Sunday, October 22, 2000 

Disclaimer: Standard disclaimer applies. See part one. 

"Well..."  
part II 

"What are we supposed to be doing?" Goten asked as he and Gohan darted across the busy street. They came to a dumpster and stood watching as the cars went by. 

"Just standing here and acting stupid. Ash should be here soon," Gohan tried to ignore the people staring at them. 

Almost as soon as he had said those words, a bright flare emerged. People gathered around Ash as he said triumphantly, "Yes, mortals. You may bask in the glowing light of deception - I mean talent - that those flamers will never emit!" He turned to Goten and Gohan. "You will open the dumpster, and then the evil spirit will overtake you both. Gohan, you will attack and kill Pan, and you Goten will unsuccessfully try to kill your father." 

"Yes, sir!" They went to the dumpster and stood ready to open it. 

Ash grinned and held up a script. "Now for this fic, we will have two special guests. Meet Agonizing and Revenge." Two figures stepped forward. 

Goten looked from Ash to Revenge. "Um, why does he look like you?" 

"That is not important," Ash replied smoothly. "Agonizing, tell them about yourself." 

"Well, I am a cannibalistic psycho that terrorizes people 'cause I'm _so_ evil!" 

"Revenge ... " Ash prompted. 

"This is difficult to explain ... " 

666 

Three people leaned against the railing of a bridge as they watched the scene with mild amusement and disgust. 

Miss.S looked among her comrades. "Did you know that we will never emit a glow?" 

"I, for one, am glad I'm not radioactive," LadyDelores responded flatly. 

"When are we going to bust him for breaking into that phosphorus warehouse?" the flamer asked while watching the glow below. 

"I thought that they stored that stuff under water," LadyDelores squinted against the bright light. "Shouldn't he be bursting into flames?" 

"That's what I thought. His skin should be burning, too." Miss.S looked away and started searching for her sunglasses. "White phosphorus is really toxic. How is he doing that?" 

"I don't want to know," the flamer blinked and turned back to the group. 

"You know, phosphorus isn't the only thing he steals..." Miss.S laughed as she held her sunglasses in one hand. 

"This fic is bad, even for Ash," 

LadyDelores looked from the scene where Ash was making weird hand gestures to the flamer. "It can only get worse." 

"So how are we going to stop this lack of talent?" Miss.S asked as she slipped on her sunglasses against Ash's glow. 

LadyDelores reached into her jacket. 

Miss.S caught the action and reluctantly stopped her sister. "In a way that won't send us to prison." LadyDelores just shrugged. 

the flamer smiled evilly, "I have an idea..." 

END PART TWO 

________________________________________________ 

Well, that's it for part two. I want to express my confusion for the reviews. I will say again, the Ash in this fic is an original character not Ash the Wanderer! Also, if any other Ash-bashers want in on this, then e-mail me. Agonizing and Revenge are in no way related to Ash the Wanderer's Agony and Vengeance. Look out for part three, coming soon. 

Oh, I would like to ask Taleya what is wrong with having an original character in my story. I made no homosexual references in this. That is for the reader to decide. For instance, they could have been playing cards, etc. I have stated it three times in part one, the Ash in this fic isn't Ash the Wanderer. I don't see where you people are getting that idea! He is an original character, not Ash the Wanderer. Now, despite the coincidences, if someone can please give me solid proof that Ash is Ash the Wanderer, send it to me. lady_delores_no_space@hotmail.com The only reference I made to ego-boy was the comment Goku made. 


End file.
